What a perfect song title to how I am feeling right now. The update on my life as of recent. Jordan texted me back yesterday saying that Danny and me should come over and play video games with him. I texted him back saying I wasn't sure when Danny was getting back but we should figure something out. Jordan calls me later that evening and I was preoccupied with something. Danny was too busy and tired to go so i called Jordan back and told him that we could do something else tonight or just wait until another night when Danny was coming. Jordan said that he had a friend on the other line whose aunt had just passed away and that he would call me back right after he finished talking. He did not. I've been on pins and needles the entire day. And I really want to call him, but i know ill lose my dignity if I do. I should be able to walk away but why can't I. It's about me, not him, but ME. Found my first white hair this morning too.
Although the white stripes song actually talks about a relationship breakup and what I am going through is just a dating situation, I still feel like it relates to me. I have no idea what to think of Jordan. Everyone is telling me to just be me. To forget him, and I have no idea why it is so difficult. I think I just should have and not text him back on Saturday.
But now I can walk away with dignity still. So just let it be that. I don't want to deal with him anymore. The situation has upsetted me quite a bit. And yes I can wait until I never see him again.
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